You see, I once got myself into a rare old two 'n' eight (state) when I started something that I couldn't quite fin...
The year: 1995
The Place: The bathroom of my flat in Shepherd's Bush - my spinster pad, if you will
And ....ACTION:
Ruth notices a very small flaw in the paintwork above the sink and to the right of the mirror. She peels a small amount of the paintwork off and concludes: "there are too many layers of paint here. The whole room needs stripping down to the plaster and then re-painting".
Further peeling ensues until Ruth decides that "peeling's not the way forward. Sandpaper is needed".
Ruth has sandpaper in her kitchen drawer, fetches it and begins sanding. 45 minutes later Ruth realises that sanding is:
(a) very hard work
(b) going to take for ever
There is now a 30cm square patch of exposed plaster above the sink and to the right of where the mirror should be. Ruth repeatedly looks from plaster patch to the rest of the bathroom, as her heart slowly sinks. "How many hours of my life is it going to take to remove the paint from this room?" Ruth regrets ever touching the paintwork in the first place.
Ruth leaves the room and "sleeps on it".
At work the following day, people are amused to hear of Ruth's exploits. One keen DIY-er offers to lend her his electronic sanding machine. "Problem solved", thinks Ruth! Chap turns up to work with the goods the following day and Ruth happily carts the thing home on the tube - "can't wait to start with this!"
No time for tea, certainly no time for reading any instructions, switch on, sandpaper pressed to the wall, whizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz and "****fire there's a hole in the wall. Ok. That's bad. It's powerful. Slow down." But all that I could produce were several more, smaller holes in the wall.
Abort mission.
Ruth returns, yet again (had several previous minor disasters when trying to hang pictures from the wall) to her stock of polyfilla. Out it comes, on it goes. It's way from smoothly applied - "think outside of the box, think outside of the box, buy a gigantic mirror and cover the whole think up"
There we go. All done and dusted.
Why didn't I just use paint-stripper? I don't know. There will have been a good reason, but I can't remember what it was....
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4 comments:
LOL!
I think it's one of the things I love most about being married - I can somehow shift the blame for that sort of episode...
Reminds me of a certain dress. Same kind of problem. Maybe there is an undiscovered syndrome here? Or just deja vu...
X
You're not going to let me forget that dress are you!
I do feel as if I have suffered from this "oh bother, I wish I hadn't started this now" syndrome many, many times - but I can't think of any other examples to entertain you with! Ooh, here's a good one. A really good one. I'm off to post it - it's too good for a mere comment. It needs a post all of its own!
I promise, I will never mention it again.
You do know my sister calls me elephant? NOT because of my size, but because of my fantastic memory.
I don't think it is meant in a complimentary fashion...
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